As I watched my visiting friends walk into the airport to return to Texas, a piece of me cried, “Why can’t I go home? Why can’t I be near my family and have stable friendships that don’t change every year?”
As I saw my baby niece for the first time over photos instead of being there to hug my sister to tell her how great a mom she will be, I wondered, “Is this actually worth it? God, do you deserve me living over here simply because it’s what you’ve called me to?”
I’ve found that I constantly must put the truth that God is worthy of my life over my feelings of otherwise. Especially when my brain is overcome with anxiety; that truth becomes essential. After about three months of counting the cost, I believe I’m arriving back at the right conclusion
Please don’t understand this as me complaining or wanting pity because, honestly, if we’re seeking to follow Him, I believe we will have seasons where we consider the cost. I hope you don’t read this and worry about me, I simply enjoy sharing the reality of following G0d and hope to encourage you in your walk.
In the midst of hardship, there is joy! As a group of new workers arrived at the end of August, they hit the ground running and have seen more than 10 people saved within the first two weeks! Our small groups have started up for this semester, and I get to meet with four amazing students every week!